I am really struggling with my in-school child. Can I say that to the world? I don't want to broadcast his foibles--this is more about me than him.
Last year, he chose to go to high school. The first semester was a struggle but then he found his place and his people and really enjoyed his second semester.
Sophomore year is turning out to be a different story. The work is harder and the expectations are much higher. He's no better and possibly even worse at organization than when he started school. He doesn't share classes with any pals and he bought himself his very own computer which allows him to tune out for most of his non-school hours. He's skating in the easy classes and crashing in the hard ones.
This morning there was a big, dramatic meltdown in which he flat out refused to go to his first class. I could see that he was stressed and losing it and I saw myself morph from the loving, supportive mom I imagine myself to be to nasty, nagging, I-told-you-so bitch mom. He was clearly asking for my help and had nothing to offer him but grief He doesn't know how to get himself back on track and now he knows that I don't know how to help him, either. Now we both feel like losers which isn't exactly progress.
2 comments:
We have also had some adjustment problems, but nothing as dramatic as you, yet. The Boychick is a year behind your in-school child, so he is just about to finish his first semester freshman year.
I, too, worry about how much to post on the blog for the world to see.
Can you go to the school people for help? Sometimes you can find that sympathetic teacher who can also come at the problem from a less emotional perspective. This can be of great help in working with your struggling high-schooler.
Good luck. You still have enough time to make a difference for him.
Good call, Elisheva. I had emailed the principal just before I wrote this blog post. He called me first thing this morning and we had a long talk. He's planning on calling The Dark Lord into his office for a friendly chat today.
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